Fay Grim (2006)

So this is what pretentious indie bullshit looks like…

What the fuck is up with Parker Posey?  People blame Hal Hartley, justifiably, but do people have such a big hard-on for this woman that they can’t see that she’s a horribly terrible actress?  And what’s up with the shots of her in the tub, in the falling off the shoulders shirt and that damn stupid black coat?  The repetitive teaser shots of her crotch with one bare thigh poking out?  Jeff Goldblum isn’t much better and I really, really wanted Thomas Jay Ryan to get a bullet to the head.  Anatole Taubman was okay but his lines were shit and he looked like an awkward white guy dressed up like a Middle Easterner.  James Urbaniak looked like a serial killer or possibly a child molester for most of the movie, so much so that at times you’re confused by the fact that he’s supposed to be a good guy.  I think he was probably aiming for a Harry Palmer look but he missed completely.  You don’t even want to read most of the youtube comments about Liam Aiken, he was 16 during filming.

This movie has taught 65% of its viewers what Dutch angles are.  And they’re stupidly overused in this movie.

The plot, the acting, the dialogue, the actors, the film-making were all so odious that I wouldn’t recommend this movie to anyone.  Fuck you Netflix, I wish you had negative stars.

This is the movie you’d get if you grabbed the worst of the wine drinking WASP wives and brainstormed with them for your next movie.  I don’t have to watch Henry Fool – no spies, and you couldn’t pay me to endure it.

It seemed like most of this movie revolved around her and that fucking coat.


Brings back memories of Danny O’donoghue’s ridiculous sweater+phone melodrama in the Breakeven video.

What a piece of shit.


p.s.  The “have to be a genius” code used in the memoir?  I didn’t actually understand what it was and I refuse to rewind it.  Henry Fool was a jackass, please don’t imply that he was a genius or that anyone would use a code that was “OMG, like, so spy shit complicated!”.